BikeShopBoys

BSB

2010-01-04T08:23:00.003-07:00

Thanks to Sally for finding this gem and sending it out New Year's. It's been a long time since the whole crew's been together. Maybe 2010 will see it happen... And maybe it'll see more than a couple posts here as well.

Finally I have to break the Jamison curse with a new post

2009-07-23T18:40:00.004-06:00

Yes, those are cases of New Belgium in the background. Yes, the "L" is for "Loser" from Elysian in Seattle.
"What?".

Just in time for White Man's Cinco de Mayo

2009-03-16T11:45:00.002-06:00

Hey beeyotches, here's a reason to keep from going to the bar so early tomorrow for St. Paddy's Day. CAR BOMB CUPCAKES. Quite possibly the greatest recipe for disaster ever created.

Found this stuck to the bottom of my shoe....

2009-03-08T12:44:00.002-06:00

The true KoM

2009-02-05T09:56:00.002-07:00

I wonder where the podium presentation takes place?

Where's the logic?

2009-01-26T21:51:00.002-07:00

Made the mistake of answering the phone at the shop today and the following conversation took place.

Girl: Yeah, hi. Do you have any adapters for Dunlop Valves? I just brought a bike back from Europe and don't have a way to pump the tires.

Me: Nope, but if you bring your bike down we might have some different inner tubes that would work.

Girl: Well, the tubes are perfectly fine and I don't want to waste them. (Pause) I'll just call my friend in Amsterdam and have her send me a pump. Thanks for your anyway.

Apparently she plans on never getting a flat.

Who said sprinkles were bad?

2009-01-09T20:51:00.000-07:00

Pefect morning for a ride

2008-12-21T16:37:00.002-07:00

Actually, I shouldn't brag; it wasn't really perfect. Had to throw on a long sleeve jersey and knee warmers.

Hope you get some on your birthday.....beer that is.

2008-12-03T20:27:00.002-07:00

Alright boys...

2008-11-24T18:22:00.004-07:00

Chunk and I can't be the only ones contributing to this little project. So here's a challenge.

Find a classic picture of yourself. And by classic...I mean one you wish never existed.
Next. Find a celebrity picture that closely resembles you in that Classic picture.
Last. A recent picture of yourself involved in some recent JackAssery. If I know ya'll...this really should be that hard.

Good luck.

Yup...

2008-11-14T14:53:00.002-07:00

Told ya so.

The naked guy...my team.

Slaven BLAZING though the foam...my team.

Crossing the finish line in style at the end...my team.

Ya'll have 12 months to book your tickets for next year. I recommend you do it.

If it's going to be that kind of party...

2008-11-06T12:21:00.002-07:00

SSCXWC. Ya'll are sucka's for not coming out to this thing.
Colorado's cool...
California's nice...
Harvard...well...

I'm going to go on record right now as saying "I told you so"...that this weekend actually tops last years event.

Like bringing a knife to the proverbial gun fight.

2008-10-31T10:04:00.005-06:00

Last Sunday I broke out the mountain bike for only the fourth time this year. Went out on a whim with a buddy I've never rode with on the dirt before. We met up at the trail head with his friend and when I pulled out my trusty hardtail from the back of the car, they both looked at me like I had a set of tits growing out of my back.

"What's that thing?"

"My mountain bike."

"Have you ridden out here before?"

"A couple times."

"You're insane man, insane."

Made it down just fine with the only crash being the sort that only I could pull off. Flying down the single track, I approached a boulder that occupied the better half of the trail and I told myself "now don't be a dumb ass and run into the giant rock."

So I just went in the other direction and literally rode off the trail and had a nice flight over the bars.

Good times.

It's that time of year again...

2008-10-27T12:13:00.000-06:00

O'Rourke's or Pro Tour?

2008-10-23T22:39:00.002-06:00

Does this remind anyone else of a skinnier, more sober bar tender from downtown Lincoln? What's with the Star City and the pro peloton look-a-likes? CVO and Hincapie? Sally and Levi? Davey and Floyd? Now KB and JV? Who's next?

Name that torso.

2008-10-02T10:27:00.003-06:00

Spotted this on Cyclingnews today. Hint: It's not Todd Flanders

Interbike souvenirs

2008-09-27T23:41:00.005-06:00

Took a quick little to Vegas for Interbike and made the most of it.

Added yet another photo to my "Why I can't ever run for President photo album."

Then, after half a day cruising the show I returned home with the following items:

A Bottle of ProLink Chain Lube.

A Sweet Raleigh Patch and an assortment of Raleigh pins for my bedazzled jean jacket.

2 Complimentary issues of Triathlete Magazine.

Half a dozen random price lists and catalogs.

4 sample packs of Power Bar Gel Blast Energy Chews

1 limited edition Super Record 11 speed equipped Pinarello Prince in the special edition Prince of Spain paint scheme.

Yep, it's this bike. It's the only one in Los Estados Unidos at the moment and it's chillin' in my living room. If you have the means I highly suggest picking one up.

Please excuse me for cutting this short. I have to get back filling out the required paperwork to legally change my name to Don Alejandro.

The one that started it all.

2008-09-22T08:59:00.004-06:00

Not to be crass but feel free to rub one out if you like. I won't mind. Just don't tell me.

After months of waiting and one heated bidding war later, I'm happy to announce the addition of a semi-pristine 1984 Stu Thomsen signature Huffy to my quiver of bicycles.

In the 4th grade this was the absolutely sweetest bike a kid could get. I was lucky enough to have one to call my own and it had a nice, long life of sweet jumps at Tornado Hill before it be succumbed to its Huffy genetics and finally tapped out.

I spent a good chunk of Saturday out in the garage polishing it with a diaper and listening to Van Halen. The only thing that made this day any different from any given day back in 1984 was the fact that I was listening to an iPod instead of a Walkman.

Think Fruita...

2008-09-14T20:20:00.001-06:00

It is your birthday isn't it?

2008-09-05T14:55:00.003-06:00

How old are you? I can't seem to remember, damn oldtimers...

Sign Up Now

2008-08-26T12:24:00.003-06:00

This morning...when I opened my Inbox...it was like I received an early Christmas present. Registration for SSCXWC is now open.

Now I know that trying to get ya'll up to the NW is a bit of a challenge, and normally I wouldn't even want anyone to visit during November...Crap. I normally try and get the hell out of here in November. However...this is the event of the year that really should not be missed...by anyone.

Go here and here. Registration will fill up...I guarantee it.

I'm putting together ideas for team Stiff Link and lining up my Cheerleaders for the race. Anyone interested should sign up...NOW!

Happy 30th F***n Birthday Brent

2008-08-22T17:15:00.006-06:00

So, you know you're getting old when your baby brother turns thirty. But I guess there's really nothing you can do but raise a glass, wish him the best and try your damnedest not to grow up as fast as him. Lucky for Brent, our mom has all the really embarrassing photos so I'm left posting a few that actually mean something.

This was taken pre-bike shop days for both of us and was right around the time we figured out that we could be friends as well as brothers. I'd guess he's about 13 here, and already turning a wrench better than any of the schmoes he's working with these days.

Here we are hiking behind the cabin at Redfeather Lakes about an hour out of Fort Collins. We may or not have had bikes at the cabin on this trip, but regardless, we always found time for scrambling and exploring the woods around the lake.

I think this was taken on one of our last summer family vacations. (Mom was taking the photo) This is on one of the most beautiful mountain bike trails in the US, the Flume Trail in Lake Tahoe, and we were lucky enough to ride it together on a couple occasions.

To see why he's more grown up, just scroll back through the summer's posts and check the bachelor party and wedding shots. And while I'm still getting greasy everyday playing with all things two-wheeled, he's teaching America's youth. Nice work lil'brother, and Happy Birthday. I'm sorry I can't be there to celebrate with you, but at least I won't be there when Mom realizes she's old enough to have another 30 year old son.

Fw:Ma(Doh)ne

2008-08-22T08:33:00.000-06:00

Garage 1, Bike 0

Ma(Doh)ne

2008-08-21T17:40:00.000-06:00

Garage 1, Bike 0

Tea Bags...

2008-08-21T10:33:00.002-06:00

Are not just for "Tea" any more.
Alright kids. This was a "brain" child of a kid in know in Portland. I got in on the ground floor...even though it felt completely wrong. At first I thought it was a passing fancy and was mildly amused trying to snag a picture outside the Space Needle (the first public shot I might add!) However, it was recently brought up on the Bummer Life so I guess the sight is out there.

This is in NO WAY safe for work. This is TOTALLY disturbing. I DO NOT recommend that anyone go to this site. (I'm not joking here people...before you go to the site you have to ask your self...how do I feel about full frontal male nudity?) I'm really not kidding here.

It's kinda like this scene from Bachelor Party...you can't wash the shame off once you've been to the site.

I think I've warned ya'll enough...

With that being said. I present you with this...TeaBags on TopTubes.

Your 'God' can't help you now.

A slice of awesome for your Friday...

2008-08-15T10:04:00.003-06:00

Really, does this photo need an explanation?

Yellow Jersey in Madison

2008-08-14T10:00:00.002-06:00

That's a pile Phil Wood hubs in their protective red wrapper. At least ten by my count but I could easily have missed a couple.

Very cool shop for those of you who have been around bikes for awhile. Kinda like a posh downtown Blue's.

How do you get your new bike home?

2008-08-09T17:48:00.000-06:00

On the back of your old bike. Doy.

1000 watts of rage...

2008-08-06T01:08:00.004-06:00

Whenever my life becomes blessed enough that I "get" to install a power meter and I reach the boiling point in trying to make the damn thing work, I take a step back, take a deep, focused breath and ask myself what Outdoor Bob would do in such a situation.

Since throwing wrenches at my own head is a rather counter productive option, I chose to focus my feelings of despair into a story. The kind of personal essay a person could learn to write at the Learning Annex.

You can read it here.

And it's all true.

Really, it is.

Especially the last part.

Shit like that can't be made up.

Guess who...

2008-07-31T19:19:00.001-06:00

Hint: It wasn't a party til his shirt came off.

Hope they made the new guy clean it up...

2008-07-30T11:36:00.002-06:00

Nothing like an earthquake to ruin a perfectly good day at the bike shop.

Maybe this will get Sally's Bert costume out of retirement...

2008-07-29T00:38:00.003-06:00

Genius.

My Weekend...

2008-07-21T11:44:00.002-06:00

In a Nutshell right here...I had to take the slow route into work this morning.

Poking Fun

2008-07-18T14:41:00.004-06:00

In honor or the most recent Douche Bag getting busted.

Maybe ya'll can get Swanson to translate it for you, if not I think the message is still pretty clear.

And I don't know if ya'll caught it but Chunk layed down a little smack of his own a couple days ago. Thanks Re-Todd-ed for saying what I really couldn't.

New Side Project

2008-07-17T13:43:00.003-06:00

Check out Douchebags On Bikes. If you spot anything good, send yer pics to
sawadouche [at] gmail.com.

Total Sand Bagger

2008-07-14T13:26:00.002-06:00

Yup. It was this close.

check out the 'other' blog for details.

And thanks for all the pictures from the Zoo Bar 35th.

Congrats Baby Bro

2008-06-27T17:45:00.001-06:00

Nectar of the Gods...

2008-06-27T09:09:00.001-06:00

You will kneel before Zod!

A few requirements for fixed gear ownership...

2008-06-21T14:57:00.003-06:00

Please feel free to add any requirements you might deem necessary...

1) At some point since the start of the 21st Century, you have occasionally ridden a non-fixed bicycle, either for recreation or transportation.

2) Possess the physical stamina to complete a five mile bike ride featuring at least one notable hill in 30 minutes or less AND without needing to stop for a smoke break.

3) If you're going to insist upon riding a Brooks saddle, you are forbidden from asking for a refund because it still makes your ass hurt after two week's of use.

4) When selecting your Chrome Bag, please, take no more than three into the dressing room at one time.

5) You fully comprehend that 40 mph skid stops are not covered under ANY tire manufacturer's warranty and adversely affect the durability of a tire.

6) You have the mechanical expertise needed diagnose and remedy problems such as a "chain coming loose" without having to drive your bicycle back to the bicycle shop.

7) If a repairing a flat tire is out of your comfort zone when it comes to bike repair, have at least $13.40 in your pocket or left on your parent's credit card before having said repair completed. It's all but impossible to "dine and dash" when a bicycle mechanic still has your bike in his repair stand.

Tony and Stacey's wedding weekend

2008-06-19T15:52:00.003-06:00

Sean, Zach, Ricci, Davey, Tony, Brent, Chris, Butch - not a bad looking crew, for a bunch of Bike Shop Boys.

Our camera girl. Thanks Sweetpea.

Fort Collins Brewery to Odell Brewing Co.

Tony celebrating the next morn.

Tony owned'em and Zach is still drinking...

BP Riding Pics

2008-06-19T15:41:00.002-06:00

Zach climbing outside Junction

Brent riding outside Junction

Brent leading Davey up the ridge at the Book Cliffs

Zach making the Kessel Run in under 4 parsecs.

Guess we proved them wrong

BSB Bachelor Party Crew

2008-06-19T13:55:00.009-06:00

Brent - The Bachelor, my baby brother. Thanks for getting married so we had an excuse to make this trip and have the fun, cause the trouble, drink the booze, burn the stuff, see the friends and ride the bikes.

Zach - Throw your sign in the air. Always reppin' the MW.

Davey - The Drunken Text Master. When ColoradoDave decides to throw down, it's ON!

Chumphead - He doesn't get outta Lincoln much but when he does, you can't deny he does it in style. Next stop, Harvard.

Sean - Just along for the ride to make sure the fun never stops and we keep our promise to Ma and Tiffy to bring Brent back alive.

Can you identify that beer?

2008-06-16T16:57:00.002-06:00

Since the race was in Philly you can pretty much rule out Old Style or Rainier. My guess is leaning towards a Coors Light based on the shiny can.

Either way it's cool to see someone has adopted Sally's racing program.

Now this is good marketing...

2008-06-10T18:07:00.001-06:00

I think I'm off to a banner start here kids. Remember...marketing is all about placement.

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/33930

For real?

2008-06-08T15:45:00.001-06:00

Ft Fun

2008-06-08T00:39:00.001-06:00

A bachelor party, mtb rides, a wedding, 2 breweries, and many friends, beers and good times make Davey a tired boy.

FCB

2008-06-07T16:43:00.001-06:00

Hoffmann can't wait for round 5.

Fruita yo

2008-06-04T09:14:00.001-06:00

Mmmm. Brinner.

2008-05-30T19:39:00.001-06:00

You know a race is hard when...

2008-05-26T11:30:00.002-06:00

even this guy is complaining.

Jens Voigt (CSC) didn’t hold back when queried about whether the time trial was too much following back-to-back summit finishes across the Dolomites that included eight rated climbs.

“It’s a stupid race - I don’t like it! We are at a ski area! Leave it to the mountain bikers!” said an angry Voigt. “I don't want to sound like an old grand-mother, because I know cycling is hard. But this Giro is too much. It’s like a machine that missing some oil and needs a tune-up. With a few small details, it would be so sweet. But today, for 45 minutes of racing, I have to miss an entire day. And tomorrow is four-hour transfer. Where is the time for recovery?”

Cliff's

2008-05-24T17:27:00.001-06:00

It's not what it used to be. But the 'kazis still rock.

Protect your junk!

2008-05-22T11:00:00.002-06:00

From that sweet sweet twisted mind of Dave Zabriskie comes this. Get ready to place your orders boys...for your boys.

Just be glad you didn't have to deal with this kook.

2008-05-16T12:18:00.002-06:00

Made breaking up a fight between Captain Clarke and Mr. Grey seem like a dance around the Maypole.

You can read the sordid tale here.

Powered by Chipotle

2008-05-15T09:11:00.001-06:00

I doubt a Huffy would've cleared the fence, but he got some good distance with this toss. Bummer about the chain, it looked like another stage win in the making for Slipstream.

DZ in Pink

2008-05-09T19:38:00.003-06:00

That's gonna be the headline on your favorite cycling site tomorrow morning. I'm making the call now, so no one can claim I just jumped on the Slipstream train. Zabriskie will take the final pull for the burrito fueled boys in argyle to take the pink jersey Saturday.

Telluride...part deux

2008-05-08T09:17:00.001-06:00

As a few of you may recall...I recently made a quick trip to Telluride. It turns out the damn paparazzi followed me out there. I just got this report from my buddy 'Hags'...

Hey supermodels- I was walking through salt lake city airport to my connecting flight when I noticed the tride add. As I looked closer, I could see that it was the two of you and got a good laugh and photos. Small world stuff. The profile of you, Sally, hit me right away, and then I could see you,Higgins, in the g car as well. Even your orange/white skis are in the shot and a pair of Sally's tele boards. John

Why can't they just leave me alone?!

Green to the Extreme...

2008-05-06T01:06:00.002-06:00

Something I wrote the other day is up on Bicycle.net. Y'all can check it out here. Thought you might find it interesting and Sean, you'll be happy to know there's not a single monkey reference.

More amusing than giving a hammer to a monkey...

2008-04-28T23:52:00.002-06:00

Being there are more than a couple USCF certified wrenches among the BSB, I thought the following chat I stumbled across on Midnight Ridazz (aka blindleadingtheblind.com) might offer some amusement that only a genuine bike geek could appreciate.

Somehow I think the terms "measure twice cut once" and "star fangled nut driver" won't make it into the discussion.

Newb With KHS

Thread started by HANDBONE at 04.29.08 - 1:10 am

sorry if this is a waste of thread, or too newb to help out with but yeah.

ive been riding a khs flite 100 and recently changed the stem to a threadless salsa stem. its a little smaller and shorter than the original ugly stock stem but sits WAY way too high for me, i'd bring it down lower but i hate the headset sticking out like a fucking boner. is there a way i could cut this (or shorten it) ? do i need a new fork altogether ? if a picture is needed i will post it (may have explained this poorly). i basically want the stem right at the bottom.

Tx, -Handbone

Halp

HANDBONE
04.29.08 - 1:12 am

reply

just cut the steerer on the fork if I understand you correctly.

just don't cut it too short or then you will need a new fork.

toweliesbong
04.29.08 - 1:12 am

reply

one more question, how do i cut it ?

HANDBONE
04.29.08 - 1:13 am

reply

hacksaw or pipe cutter.

if it's aluminum a hacksaw will do. if more likely, it's steel, then it's easier with a pipe cutter, but doable with a hacksaw.

if there is a star nut inside the steerer then remember to knock it down a little ways further if need be before cutting.

the cut doesn't have to be perfectly square, just close.

toweliesbong
04.29.08 - 1:15 am

reply

towliesbong. thank you very much.

my mind isnt disciplined enough to sheldon brown everything.

i appreciate the halp.

HANDBONE
04.29.08 - 1:17 am

reply

go to the kitchen or the oven or the bikerowave and ask for the Park Tools SG-6, the threadless fork steer tube saw guide. put in their vice; put the steer tube in the length that you want cut off and run the press down to lock it down. then start cutting with the hacksaw.

junkboat
04.29.08 - 1:24 am

reply

handbone, the best way to shorten the stem, use a pipe-cutter,be sure to account for 'spacers' and additional hardware, a true cut can be accomplished, using a pipe-cutter is the best way and it requires less work also, if you can attach pics in the exploded view, it will give us a better understanding as far as the advice we can give you, i have all the tools required to do the job correctly, be very careful you don't fuck it up, ok?

eddieboyinla
04.29.08 - 1:29 am

reply

by the way who is sheldon brown, just joking with you, most newb's have no idea about that guy, good luck.

eddieboyinla
04.29.08 - 1:31 am

reply

ooh will do, will do.

HANDBONE
04.29.08 - 1:31 am

reply

sheldon brown is my homeboy yo.

HANDBONE
04.29.08 - 1:32 am

reply

lol, cool

eddieboyinla
04.29.08 - 1:32 am

reply

Bachelor Party

2008-04-21T19:51:00.004-06:00

My baby bro is getting married this summer and we're planning to spend a few days campin, ridin and drinkin in CO the first week of June. All original BSB will be getting info soon, and all the rest of you trouble makers are welcome as well.

SAVE THE DATE

2008-04-21T19:32:00.004-06:00

These kids are getting hitched in Lincoln on June 27th. The ceremony will be fairly traditional, but the reception will be off the hook. Brave Combo will be rocking the Chicken Dance like none other. All the original BSB crew are encouraged to attend. More info to come via snail mail.

The BBP wiill hit you like a DDT

2008-04-17T22:04:00.002-06:00

This is something I've been rasslin' about for a couple days now but the influx of TTT arse and drunken hair metal Sally have lead me to believe that what I'm about to post will be OK for this family friendly blog.

Earlier in the week a gal came into get some "spinning shoes." Didn't take long to notice she had the Oakland Booty that Sir Mix-A-Lot is so fond of.

And it certainly didn't take long for a colleague of mine to realize she didn't have just ol' dumper but an AVN Award Winning All-Star Dumper.

Can you say "Holy Shnikes?"

I sure did.

Not more than 10 seconds after the door hit our new best friend in the can on the way out, I was treated to a glimpse of her at the work place.

Not to be crass but... if you were to sit a monkey down in front of a computer and waited for him to type in "redtube.com," you'd be getting warm.

Then if that same monkey got on a roll and typed in "big butt parade," your jaw would soon be hitting the floor.

Mine sure did.

TTT!!!!

2008-04-17T18:24:00.000-06:00

Looks like they need a 4th. Sean, you up to the challenge?

Still Recovering

2008-04-17T16:35:00.002-06:00

Som-beotch

Got-Damr

Words we've all used to describe on hell of a bender. They're good words. They describe exactly how we're feeling and maybe even a little bit more. However...sometimes these words just aren't enough. There are those occasions...like Sean's Graduation...the nite I went to the Drunk Tank...Closing Day in Tellurde...and (I'm sure) Hoffman's going away party.

I'm going to scratch my head until I'm bald...(you know)...trying to come up with a word to better describe these events. I'm currently fond of "Cashing Out" in honor of the great Johnny Cash. If you come up with anything...please let me know.

To see us 'Cashing Out'...go here.

Oh my!

2008-04-17T09:38:00.001-06:00

Bikes, beer and 'bonis(?)

2008-04-14T20:52:00.006-06:00

Gettin ready to plop down in front of the tele for game 3, Aves vs. Wild (series tied with both games decided in OT) I realized the fridge was lacking malted beverage. So I hopped on my new GF Rig, the third bike I rode today, and headed to Stan's for some PBR.

Forsberg, Sakic and Hejduk back together. It's like the Hanson bros but with goals instead of foil. Old school hockey, eh? Go Aves!

Happy Birthday Mr.,

2008-04-07T17:29:00.005-06:00

Norris. Happy Birthday to you!
Yep, he's in his 40's and he's got mad style...

Could this be Hoffmann's long lost brother?

2008-04-04T00:18:00.005-06:00

Just paid a visit to hotchickswithdouchebags.com for my daily reminder to give thanks for not being a douchebag when I was greeted by this image...

I know the eyebrows and facial hair are a little different but use your 'magination and you'll understand.

Big Pimpin!

2008-04-03T07:24:00.002-06:00

Anyone wanna dance with Vance?

Stupidest bike lane?

2008-03-28T22:26:00.001-06:00

How about 14th in Lincoln? Or any bike lane in Lincoln for that matter? Can anyone top this?

Reese's New Hobby

2008-03-28T17:54:00.002-06:00

Pedal, Pedal, Pedal

2008-03-26T16:35:00.001-06:00

Didn't someone call me the other nite trying to find this video? ">

Gold Pan

2008-03-24T19:13:00.001-06:00

Sally's door to back alley lovin.

Easter

2008-03-23T13:33:00.001-06:00

Sweetpea & Bart

Davey Bunny

2008-03-23T11:06:00.001-06:00

Pay attention!

2008-03-21T15:26:00.002-06:00

I don't know if ya'll have seen this...but see if you can pay attention.

">

MEETSES

2008-03-20T08:57:00.005-06:00

After spending much time wiping their drool (and who knows what else) of my Moots, Steve and Alan of TrekKC and BSB at heart, have finally got sweet ti rides of their own. I just wish they weren't so much nicer than my '96 YBBSL with v-brakes and little 26" wheels.

Steve's MootoX YBB with slider drops...

And Alan's, new for '08, MootoXZ with 100mil plus...

Have fun boys.

Hermes just might find his red headed Bigfoot after all...

2008-03-19T23:51:00.003-06:00

To keep the Harvard bound party going for a little longer, I'd like to add that earlier today I was enjoying the nice, breezy day by kickin' it down at the La Brea Tar Pits. I was "wearing sunglasses" as the kids say and taking pictures of my shadow when suddenly, out of nowhere, I received this text message.

If I ever had to go out on a limb and think up a text message I'd never plan on seeing pop up in my phone the sentence you see above would be a strong, strong contender for the number one slot.

Needless to say, I just about lost my shit when I read it.

Most importantly this message gave me hope. Real hope. Not Obama's imaginary hope. Real hope that sometime in the future, I won't be the least bit surprised when Hermes writes to say that he finally bagged a six foot tall red headed Asian chick (who wasn't at one time a man) with double D sized boobs.

Congrats, Chris. Good luck finding Old Style in Cambridge, chump.

Smartest Bartender You Know

2008-03-19T21:07:00.003-06:00

For those of you who don't know, check it out. Chumphead is reppin' the BSB Ivy-style. And I'm not talkin about that unrated, 3 disc Poison Ivy box set you have hidden under your bed Sally. I'm talkin Ivy League y'all.

That's right. The man who took twice as long as Sally, and nearly five more years than me, to graduate is headed to Harvard to get his Masters on.

In the words of ODB, "Good work."

The SRM will be here next week.

2008-03-19T13:16:00.003-06:00

Reached new heights of geekiness. At the moment my road bike has both and iBike and a Powertap. Dual power meters are exactly the sort of thing I need for rides ending that end at the House of Pies.

If you jive turkeys really loved me, you'd shoot me now.

Found this on Raleigh Commutes blog...

2008-03-18T09:06:00.000-06:00

very worthy...

GOOGLE MAPS "BIKE THERE" - GO VOTE FOR IT!

GoogleMapsBikeThere.org was created to ask Google to help make the world safer for bicyclists by adding bicycle routes to Google Maps. Consider signing the petition, Google just might listen. Adding the “Bike There” option to the Google Maps toolbar of “Drive There” and “Take Public Transit” would be a valuable tool for both everyday and new cyclists to find routes, at home and on the road.

Happy St. Pat's!

2008-03-17T17:06:00.000-06:00

Good news! There is still time to Irish proof your castle...

2008-03-17T09:30:00.002-06:00

My occasional dance partner Von Bang Bang can show you how.

Irish Proofing your Castle for St. Patricks Day

It's no Shoemaker's...

2008-03-13T10:16:00.001-06:00

Gotta get fueled up for a chilly, and possibly wet, ride.

A bit late on the picture thing.....

2008-03-06T10:45:00.002-07:00

I'm a soccer player or a politician!

My new favorite street.

2008-03-05T20:00:00.005-07:00

Went for a ride in hills to enjoy the pleasant and breezy 70 degree temps and struggled upon the greatest street in the history of streets.

If you're too lazy to click the pic, the street is called Treasure Trail.

Oh and I think it was Hermes who referenced carbon fiber and ceramic bearings being all the rage.

Well feast your eyes on these trick carbon fiber ceramic bearing equipped dérailleur pulleys. Just the sort of upgrade that's perfect for a tubby bitch such as myself.

If you look really close you might be able to make out the big pimpin' gold carbon underneath all the grease and grime, cause it's all about ridin' dirty.

Holla!

SWEET RIDES!

2008-03-05T12:54:00.004-07:00

Thought everyone would appreciate these shots of a bike shop I found in Copenhagen, Denmark last week. It looked more like a gallary than anything else. I actually saw 3-4 of the delivery bikes being used to haul things around the city. These people love to ride their bikes.

In your face Space Coyote!

2008-03-04T14:57:00.002-07:00

Just wanted to make sure you Jive Turkeys saw this.

Suddenly the Old Testament makes a lot more sense.

Israeli Researcher: "Moses was High on Drugs."

I'm going to try again...

2008-03-04T13:27:00.003-07:00

Alright kids. Last time I asked for help with this kind of thing all I got was a bunch of juvenile replys...that weren't even that good, ya'll need some new material.
This is an early sketch of my Cross bike. I know this is going to be a stretch...but use your imaginations...it's going to be a single speed. Not a geared bike.

Any recommendations? Graphics?

WWODBD?

2008-03-03T09:41:00.002-07:00

Sometimes I wonder what Outdoor Bob would would make of the whole fixed gear craze amongst all the girl's jeans wearing dudes out there.

Like, how many hipsters do you think he could handle in a day before blowing his top and flying into a wrench throwing fit of rage?

For me, the number was one yesterday.

Guy comes into the shop yesterday with his top tube padded Pista Concept freshly plucked from the back of his car. He wanted to get his whip set up with a new cog. Why he would pay to have it done instead of purchasing the tools is beyond me.

Anyhoo, I just happened to be in the back the moment our Service Manager is cranking down the dude's lock ring with enough effort to make it look like he was trying to push the earth down.

Couple hours later he comes back madder than a dog shitting tacks. The guy was so furious his Weezer styled glasses were fogged over with rage. Seems his lock ring slipped nearly causing him to die when he had to make a panic stop.

Even worse than that, in his sheer desperation to avoid the Grim Reaper he scuffed his limited edition kicks when he pulled out a page from the Fred Flintstone playbook shoehorned his way to a stop.

After apologizing to the guy about the life risking inconvenience and assuring him we'd get his bike fixed, I asked him just what he was doing.

Long story short, the guy went straight from the shop to the top of Griffith Park where he proceeded to go 40mph on a brakeless fixed down a mountain road that ends with a busy 6 lane intersection.

When he got to that busy 6 lane intersection, the stoplight was as red as ODB's head after having to deal with the 20 year-old version of myself of a 110 degree full moon Friday. He said he thought he was going to be able to shoot the gap between cars doing 45mph and at the last second he realized he couldn't and went to skid stop but oops, his lock ring slipped! And the poor fella had to drop out of the hipster race he so wanted to win.

D'oh!

Unbeknownst to our hipster friend, moments before unleashing his tale of woe on my non-caring ears, I had being dealing with a guy who's epiphany of the year was "You mean if just one spoke breaks I should stop riding my bike before the others do?" so I really didn't care that I was taking my life into my own hands by asking a question of my own.

"Granted the cog that we just installed slipped but have you ever considering taking a step back to realize what you're doing is very far from the intended use of your bicycle and that riding a fixed gear without a break isn't exactly the smartest thing nor is trying to intentionally run a red light?"

The steam of rage that had cleared from the dude's glasses was suddenly back with a Charles Bronson vengeance.

"Nobody else's cog slipped! Only the one that I had your mechanics install!"

"Well that's probably because everyone else in your little race was smart enough to install their new gears days before so they'd be able to readjust their cogs if need be. Every knuckle head in the world knows that a fresh cog will slip after it's installed. Plus, why would you put on a new part and then go straight to a race? Even triathletes aren't that dumb."

"F@ck you! I'm gonna go on LAFIXED.COM and let all 3,000 people who subscribe know how bad this place sucks!"

Oh joy.

On the bright side maybe that means we won't have to deal with hipsters anymore.

Challenge #3

2008-02-29T22:16:00.002-07:00

My google image can beat up your google image.

I really gotta start waxing my chest again.

Challenge #2

2008-02-29T17:43:00.003-07:00

Googled my real name and got this...

Bet you guys didn't know there was another one who rode bikes. Now I know what it feels like when doves cry. Millhouse collision anyone?

Then looking up "Bobby Salsa" we get...

While he might be a fresher, keep in mind I was the creator of the "Wash, Rinse, and Repeat" dance move.

Challenge...

2008-02-29T12:18:00.003-07:00

It's simple...it involves the internet (which you happen to be on right now)...and it's kinda interesting...

Go to Google Images.
Type in your name.
Post the very first picture that comes up.
The winner gets...well...nothing...but it could be interesting.

this is mine...

Who the hell are these guys?! And how do they know I like to rock?!

Does this look familar?

2008-02-28T15:28:00.006-07:00

To quote the great Bas Rutten "looky looky what we have here."

Looks like a bike but what kind?

I think we all know this headbadge.

Looks like Ti...

...and carbon?

The Roadster ain't a model found in the latest IF line up.

Twin carbon top tubes bonded to titanium? Talk about one of those things that makes a person go hmm. Just where have we seen something like this?

Oh yeah at the Handmade Bike Show.

Yep. It's this bike, bitches. Still waiting for the pink Chris King wheelset to arrive. Do you know what's the best part?

My name was on the box.

Know what's the worst part?

It's not for me.

Too bad Lionel Hutz is no longer with us. He could find away for this bike to be mine.

More pics to follow when it's built up.

Defibrillator not included

2008-02-27T13:07:00.005-07:00

2lbs of Bacon...woven...

Bake and form around a bowl...

Turn over and add various breakfast goodies...

I would have added a Red Beer instead...but I'm not going to knock my former boss. He took it to a level that I'm proud of.

Here he comes.....

2008-02-27T09:28:00.004-07:00

(click on the picture)

News for you!

2008-02-27T09:23:00.002-07:00

Hey everyone, I saw on FFL that Blue's is hiring for bike sales and wrenches. What do ya say we all send in applications?
Speaking of Blues, guess who I saw at Tour de Cali? You guessed it...the man who owns a bike store and never rides a bike....

Seattle

2008-02-24T21:04:00.001-07:00

Local Seattle Hippity-Hop. Sweet thing is most of this video is shot in the south end of Seattle...so a lot of this was done in my neighborhood. The last scenes of Rizal Bridge are right down from my house.

Check it...these guys are really good.

Remember this?

2008-02-19T09:00:00.001-07:00

I'll give a sixer of Old Style Tall Boys to the first...

2008-02-15T14:04:00.002-07:00

person who gets Lance Armstrong on the phone at his soon-to-be-opening Austin bike shop and gets him to fall for the ol' "Do you carry bicycles?" trick.

Best phone call of the day...

2008-02-13T10:19:00.004-07:00

Yesterday, for whatever unexplainable reason, the phone was ringing off the hook. A seemingly endless run of the same question asked more ways than Eskimos have works for snow.

"What time do you close?"

"When do you close?"

"What are your business hours today?"

"Until what time are you open?"

"How late are you open today?"

"When do you close during the week?"

"How long are you there till?"

"You're open from when to when?"

Then, a call out of the blue to break up the monotony.

"Does Lance Armstrong ever come to your store,?" asked a mystery caller with the urgency of someone with a ticking time bomb tied to their testicles.

"Um, excuse me?"

"Lance Armstrong. You ever seem him there?"

"Uh, um, sometimes."

"Well you tell that mothafucka I'm looking for his ass and when I find him I'm gonna beat the shit outta 'em."

"Uh, OK." (To myself I asked, self: When did your place of business become a place to ferry threatening messages Junior High style?)

Then our frantic mystery caller continued...

"Earlier today I was ridin' in the park and saw Lance Armstrong so I started pedalin' really fast and I passed his ass going up hill. He didn't like that so he told me to fuck off and then he pulled out this crazy phone that wasn't a phone and out of nowhere these black cars pulled up and run me over. I just got home. My bike's all busted and when I see Lance Armstrong I'm gonna kick his mothafuckin' ass!!!"

Click.